“Embracing the paradox that we simultaneously are and are not our story is precisely what enables us to keep writing new ones. My story about the abuse I experienced at the hands of my father will always be a part of me, but it no longer defines me. Of course, I sometimes spiral back into trauma; unlike the self-help pundits who say it’s possible to simply let go of the old hurts by cleansing them with a dose of love and light. I know that even as the impact fades, this experience is something that will be with me for the rest of my life.
That said, healing is not a linear journey. Old trauma is wrapped up in the fabric of the new stories I’ve created for myself, and the resulting pattern is not nice and clean and neat. In fact, the deeper we all go, the messier and more chaotic it will get. It is the contrasting loops of darkness and light, life and death, defeat and triumph, that make the human story such a compelling and gorgeous one…”
(~an excerpt from ‘Women for One’ founder Kelly McNelis’s new book, ‘Your Messy Brilliance’)
‘There is no controlling life.
Try corralling a lightning bolt,
containing a tornado. Dam a
stream and it will create a new
channel. Resist, and the tide
will sweep you off your feet.
Allow, and grace will carry
you to higher ground. The only
safety lies in letting it all in –
the wild and the weak; fear,
fantasies, failures and success.
When loss rips off the doors of
the heart, or sadness veils your vision with despair,
practice becomes simply bearing the truth.
In the choice to let go of your
known way of being, the whole
world is revealed to your new eyes.’
‘When we think of our personal self love it is important to remember that it does not have to be perfect for us to do and receive amazing things. Yes, a growing self love will brighten your life and attract wonderful experiences, but that does not mean that it is a requirement for good things to happen.
Amazing things sometimes come even in our darkest moments, and difficult moments will arise even after we have accomplished much growth and developed our peace. This is the nature of life, it is an ocean that moves between calmness and storms, the movement of the water is what nurtures our experiences that grant us wisdom.
We should not pause our lives and wait for a time when our self love will be perfect, instead we should move forward with our goal of self healing as a constant aspect of our lives. Always open to release, always learning, always keeping a part of our awareness inward so that we can observe our truth, always seeking to live harmlessly and love actively. Sending love to all beings. May we all understand that we have so much to give. May we all be open to receiving. May we all heal ourselves and the world.’
‘After feeling driven my whole life
something very near the center has
unwound and I can no longer hurry
through airports or return all my calls.
And sometimes people I barely know
swim up like old worn fish to show me
the map of their gills, and the one long
gash of something they once swallowed,
and how it has cut each breath since.
And I am honored to warm them
like a blanket. But when alone, I
find it hard not to watch
what I swallow.
When alone, these things
I’ve wanted to know since birth
feel so unanswerable, I must
have been torn from them.
I’m sure a hawk doesn’t know it’s a
hawk. I’m sure a spirit doesn’t know
it’s being spiritual. Or a screen door
slapping, like a tired life, in the night,
if it’s opening or closing.
Though we give up the murky fears,
we still can’t know our worth, any-
more than a faceless treasure
can fathom why
it was boxed
“We are in this together. None of us truly walk in isolation, even when we cannot sense the presence of another for miles upon miles. Even in the worst of our desolation. Even during our coldest 3am breakdown. Even when we shut out the world and spin in circles until we collapse. Even then the light still gets in. Even then the heart still opens and reaches, tendrils of hope curling and bending toward slivers of light. Upward, outward, in all directions – seeking light at all cost. One way or another, we all grow toward the light.” – Jeanette LeBlanc
“I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things:a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.
I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life. I’ve learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a life. I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.
I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on bothhands; you need to be able to throw some things back.
I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.
I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one. I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, orjust a friendly pat on the back. I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn.
I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
‘Never be afraid of pain.⠀
We live in a society that has made us run for tablets or to doctors to fix our pain.⠀
Pain is a great teacher.⠀
It teaches us that when pain happens, we go and find the source of the pain.⠀
We sit with the pain and ask it what it is shouting at us for?⠀
What is the lesson we are not getting, nor acknowledging?⠀
What are we holding onto for dear life, when we should let go?⠀
What are we not digesting?⠀
What are we not expressing?⠀
Where is anger?⠀
Where is resentment?⠀
Where is fear?⠀
Where is unforgiveness?⠀
Where is holding onto grudges?⠀
Where is holding onto pain – because there is a payoff somewhere, like it earns us sympathy or we can use it as an excuse, or as “look at poor me?”⠀
Pain teaches us to take responsibility.⠀
Pain teaches us to let go of all that old baggage, that emotional clogging, that intense holding onto what no longer serves our highest soul growth and good.⠀
I went through excruciating pain in the last few years, in order to delve deeply into myself, and to release whatever I was holding onto in the form of emotional baggage, false beliefs, low self-worth issues, etc. one by one. ⠀
Yes, it take guts to delve ever deeper inside yourself for healing and answers.⠀
Yes, it take guts to delve into that pain and ask it what it is trying to tell you.⠀
But, let me tell you, once I shed all that baggage, and worked through the pain, my whole life changed, and a deep inner peace, contentment, equilibrium and immense love filled up all all of me.⠀
It is infinitely worthwhile and healing comes, healing balm is spread, and love opens up and expands, as the walls around the heart come tumbling down, and love is freed up and expands, ever expands and to be free to roam where it wills.’
“The marks life leaves on everything it touches transform perfection into wholeness. Older, wiser cultures choose to claim this wholeness in the things that they create. In Japan, Zen gardeners purposefully leave a fat dandelion in the midst of the exquisite, ritually precise patterns of the meditation garden. In Iran, even the most skilled of rug weavers includes an intentional error, the “Persian Flaw,” in the magnificence of a Tabriz or Qashqai carpet…and Native Americans wove a broken bead, the “spirit bead,” into every beaded masterpiece. Nothing that has a soul is perfect. When life weaves a spirit bead into your very fabric, you may stumble upon a wholeness greater than you had dreamed possible before.”
‘If we examine nature, it is clear that everything is in a constant state of movement. Trees are a great example, in cycles they swing back and forth from experiences of growth to experiences of releasing, all the while alive, all the while growing. If we are refusing to grow, then we are moving against the flow of nature, the flow of change is so powerful that to move against it can only mean difficulty.
Sometimes growing hurts too, but it is the type of pain that is easier to endure because we know that it is for our greater good. Sending love to all beings. May we all create space in our lives for transformation. May we all transform as many times as our happiness and freedom require.’