BEYOND ILLNESS: NOTE TO A RECOVERING FRIEND
‘Your illness is not against you, friend. The aches and pains you feel in your body are not punishments. You did nothing wrong. This day is not an indication of weakness or failure. You are receiving yet another invitation – to slow down. To rest. To take each moment as it comes. To let go of all that which is unnecessary, including perhaps your search for answers. To reassess your priorities, to remember that which is primary. To turn towards the present moment, this moment, the only moment there is, your true home, your resting place, your place of connection.
To stay rooted here, in the present scene of the movie of your life. To stop rewinding the movie into past scenes of regret, missed chances and wrong turns. And to stop fast-forwarding the movie into future scenes of pain or sorrow, further missed chances, unattainable goals or even death. To come right back here. To befriend uncertainty, rediscover the thrill of not knowing. To say YES to this moment, even if you feel like a NO. To include the NO, too.
To use your aches and pains, not be used by them; to meet the sensations in your body with gentleness and curiosity, not to resist or try to make them go away. To sink deeply into the moment; not to try to escape it – and to allow yourself to want to escape it too. To trust the intelligence of this incredible body, its extraordinary capacity to heal and deal with anything that comes its way. To admit that you are exhausted from the struggle of pretending to be a ‘me’, tired from trying to fit in, trying to say the right thing, trying to be a success in the world, trying to hold it all together, even trying not to try.
To find a place of humility, and even gratitude, amidst the rubble of the old dreams. To let go of your idea of ‘How Life Was Going To Be’, and to embrace ‘How Life Actually Is’. To rediscover a sense of sacredness, where you are, how you are.
This just may be your invitation to awakening. Drop the word ‘sickness’; see this as a path of deeper healing, beyond the physical. A calling to Truth. Always a beginning, never a defeat.’
– Jeff Foster